It’s Never ONE Trip to the Hardware Store!!!

It’s fall again and Jane is messing with the outside of her nest!  It’s time to clean up the patio furniture, get the out-door fire pit ready, and trim the bushes so she can build a fire and watch the embers glow as the sun sets over her Chateau!  Sounds delightful, doesn’t it!

Well, it all started (for me) with a trip to Ace Hardware to pick up a can of Rustoleum Flat (not Gloss) spray paint for the wrought iron table!  The summer sun, rain, and heat have taken their toll and it needs to look just “perfect” for Jane to enjoy the total ambience of the setting!  So, off to Ace I go!

When I got back home, Jane had already cleaned the patio and had the table in the grass ready for the paint…..and I settled in to watch TV!  In a couple of minutes, Jane summoned me because she could not find the little wire brush she uses to scrape off any residual rust on the table.  The brush was not to be found in the disorganized mess I call my work bench in the garage.  So, I am off to Ace for the second time to pick up the little brushes.

Back home, I tried to lend a “well intended, but useless” hand to Jane with one of the brushes before I headed back into the house to get horizontal in the comfort of my Barcalounger!  About 15 minutes later, Jane is calling again.  Guess what?!?!  One can of paint is not enough…so, where am I headed?  You’ve got it…back to Ace for the third time!  I hinted that we could wait and finish the table later…..but Jane was having none of that nonsense!

Upon from my final and triumphant return, Jane was ready to put the finishing touches on the table.  She was wearing some rubber gloves to keep the paint off of her hands as she fretted to get it all looking even.  Unfortunately, she had the glove on her right hand and somehow managed to get paint on the thumb and nail of her left hand.  Any sailor would have been proud of the terms used to vent her frustration as she headed into the house to scrub off the paint from her new manicure!

Finally, the job is done and it all looks great…just like Jane likes it!   And I have made only three trips to Ace.  I spent a total of $16 and am wondering if Ace made any money on me today.  If they have a 30% margin, then my purchases gave them about $5 in gross profit.  And, I spent almost that much in gasoline driving to and from the hardware store.

But, that is par for the course when a suburbanite tries to undertake little homeowner tasks.  I can remember making multiple trips on the same day when I tried to fix a broken sprinkler line in the yard!  That’s just the way it goes.

But, the backyard is ready to receive guests and the first day the temperature drops below 80 degrees, Jane will fire up the pit and have a glass of Chablis while she admires her handiwork!

BTW, on my third trip back home today, I noticed my neighbor putting some fertilizer on their lawn.  It’s probably a good idea to give the grass a little help after the heat of the summer.  Crap, I guess that means I’ll be making a fourth trip to Ace a little later.  But, now it is time for my afternoon nap!!!  The grass can wait!!


3 responses to “It’s Never ONE Trip to the Hardware Store!!!

  1. I hope you guys are able to enjoy the fire tonight! It’s only 80 up here today! So nice!

  2. Bob, do you know how lucky you are that Jane takes the inititive to get the patio ready for use? It sounds to me like you are a lucky man…..even though you run some errands. Tell Jane I like what I hear about her.

  3. Atlantic……It is true! I am a lucky guy!!!

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